I was so lazy last week on vacation. I did not run or walk one time! My sister and I just took it easy........reading, watching Christmas movies, crocheting and just enjoying being together. I took the whole week off from exercise and I am feeling it. I do feel refreshed in many ways, but feel like I am starting over with my running after that much time off. We'll see. I gained weight, ate junk, and now I'm feeling sluggish and craving fruits and veggies. Today begins a new day, new week, new start. I am ready. Lord, give me Your strength and discipline.

Well, I am back tonight from my mom's. I went on Tuesday morning and stayed in the camper each night. It was a great time with family! My sister and I grocery shopped on Tuesday, cooked all day on Wednesday, cooked some on Thursday and today we rested while the others shopped.

I did get out on a dirt road behind their property that the gas company put in this year. Tuesday we went out for just 20 minutes, but I mostly ran. On Wednesday, we went out for 30 minutes, walking hills and running the flat areas and small hills. It felt great, but I hate running on gravel. It hurts my ankles.

Yesterday and today I have not exercised at all and I ate way too much junk while at my mom's. It has made me feel horrible for the most part. So tonight Wade and I stopped by the grocery store (after having a yummy 50th anniversary dinner for my parents at Bonefish!) to get some fruits and veggies. My sister and I are heading to Branson this Sunday and we want to rest and eat well, exercising everyday. I need it. I want it.

Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving! We have so much to be thankful for. I am just so grateful that I have my health enough to exercise at all. To God be the glory!

It's Thanksgiving week and I am heading out of town. I am taking my walking/running shoes, but where I will be (out in the country on a gravel road), I will probably be walking instead of running.

I will be with my whole extended Hill family, so lots of people. I know that in order to remain loving and kind in my own heart I will have to do a few things:

~ Be in the Word

~ Be in prayer

~ Exercise

Praying that you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday with you and yours. May God truly make us grateful for all things, but mostly for His precious love toward us while we were still sinners. May I live for Him completely in return for this great love!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Yesterday I did not run at all. I got dressed, ready to run, but then Wade and I decided to go see Blind Side (movie). We drove to 3 different theaters and it was sold out at each place. Ugh!

So this afternoon, after Luke and I finished college applications and scholarship applications, I asked him to run on Kanis with me. I just wanted to see how it would be. I have been dreaming about running toward town. I have even marked the one mile mailbox in my car so that I know where I want to try to run to first.

But when we got out there, I thought running toward Paron might be flatter, so we began running there. I will have to say that I didn't love running on Kanis like I thought I would. Cars are driving by so fast (45-60 mph) that it is scary. Some of them don't even move over a little to give room. I always ran into the shoulder and grass when I heard a car coming, but it will still unsettling. The shoulder had big gravel pieces, too, so it was uncomfortable for my ankles.

I only did 1.5 miles today. There were small hills, rolling hills, but nothing major at all. When I got a ways from my car, I sprinted faster just to see if I could. I made it.

But when I got to my car, my shins and my ankles really hurt. I have not had that problem at all in my running so far. Not sure if it was the gravel or what.

So I can say I tried it. I think I will go back to my road for my running. It gets mundane, for sure, but I don't have to worry about cars at all.......or creepy people. :)

Today Wade and I took Luke to look at Arkansas Tech in Russellville. I didn't run at all today and even had lunch at Whatta Burger. The burger was just okay (have I said I am enjoying meat less and less?!), but the fries were great! I loved them! And I thought my taste buds were changing more toward healthy foods...... :)

I missed running today. I have been very sore today, though, in my rumpus! I guess I worked my lower body more than I thought on the Power 90 yesterday. Wade and I were talking today and wondering if I need to run one day and do Power 90 the next. I don't know if I can do them both in one day. I wonder how my running would have gone today if I had had the chance. I only wanted to soak in the tub with very hot water!

I think the thing I missed most about NOT running today was clearing my mind and praying while I run. On the days that running is easier, I can focus on praying......and I've had much to pray for lately. I did have prayer time today, but usually I get a second session during my run.

I sure wish I had some flat roads to run on around here. I have been dreaming about flat roads and wondering how much it would improve my distance. I don't know if I'll ever know. I am so far out in the woods. It would take me 35-40 minutes to drive down to the river. I think it would be great to run down by the river. Wade and I have ridden our bikes down there and it was great! Usually pretty busy with traffic, but beautiful! Maybe one day when time is not an issue (will there ever be such a day?) and my kids are out of the house.

Hoping to get a good run in tomorrow. From reading other blogs, I think I am going to run for a certain amount of time instead of thinking about the miles. Maybe that would help me. We'll see. I've been reading a lot about a tool called the Garmin. I am going to have to look into it.

Rough day. I'm not sure why, but the running was so hard for me today. I did do the Power 90 Sculpt workout first, but it was very little legs involved. A few lunges and squats, but not very many at all. Still, maybe it affected me. Not sure, but I went out to run down the dirt road. I was going to go down to Kanis, have the kids stand at the gate while I ran a little ways on the road, then come back up the hill and back down the dirt road to my house.

I started out running and I felt horrible. It's like I understood for the first time what Wade means when he says he "didn't have any legs" in soccer. My breathing was fine, but my legs were so slow. I felt like an old man running.

I didn't want to give in though so I would walk for about 30 seconds and then make myself run again. Most of the way down the dirt road to Kanis is a gradual uphill slope. There are a few small dips in the road, but mostly it goes uphill from my house.

That makes it nice on the way home, though. A lot of flat spaces with a gradual downhill slope to it all. I don't like running downhill at a steeper slope, but I didn't have any trouble at all going back home. But I felt so bad by the time I got to the top of our big hill that I didn't even go down it. I turned around and ran the whole way back home.

By the time I got back to our driveway, I felt better, so I told the kids I was going to go again so that I could get my 2 miles in. It would have been easier to quit, but I didn't want to. I don't want to give in when it's hard. I want to persevere in this journey of learning to run.......for many reasons.

So this time going uphill was not so bad. I had more energy and felt better. I did walk a little, but not much. Then turned around again at the Prays driveway and ran home.

I feel good now. Yes, I am sweating and my legs are sore, especially my quads, but it is a good kind of sore. I am so glad I pushed myself today. I needed it.

It is much like my spiritual walk. I found myself praying today at the end of my run: "Lord, running will never be easy for me, will it? Much like running the Christian race. It will never be easy, but help me persevere and not give in to my desire to quit, my desire for ease."

Running does help me when I am stressed and have a lot on my mind. That is true. I come back inside feeling a little lighter. Not sure why, but it's true.

I guess I am going to make blog public by Christmas, if I am still running. I am so afraid of failing in this. Last night at youth, there was a gal who sat down to talk to me and she said that she "used to be a runner," had foot trouble and was getting back into it. I could not tell her that I had started running. I haven't been able to tell anyone but family.

I just don't feel like a runner. I feel like a sluggish jogger. I don't know how others run because I don't run with them, but I feel like a loser when it comes to this.

BUT I am helped. I am improving. I am encouraged. I have to set my own pace and run as only I can, pushing myself when weary and striving for more. That, with the Lord's help, I hope to do. Even if I never run like others.

One more thing.......my eating is better. I am desiring healthier things. My tastes are changing. I still want a bit of dark chocolate, but I keep Ghirardelli Squares (60% cacao) around most of the time. I usually only need a taste to be satisfied.

Another treadmill day. I did school first and so I didn't get on the treadmill until almost 12:30pm. I ran/walked for 2 miles. Not sure what is going on with me this week, but I feel so sluggish. I have had lots of headaches, so last night I took a Zyrtec so I would wake up stuffy and with a headache. I woke up during the night with the same headache right over my right eyebrow. Today is is faintly there. Wonder if it is the eating of the ice that I am doing. Still need to go find me a dr to get a physical........

Anyway, 2 miles on the treadmill. I walked for about 3 minutes to warm up, then ran. I did increase my speed to 6 mph everytime I ran. That seemed to be more comfortable to me on the treadmill given my stride. I did get tired more quickly, but I think part of that is this crazy treadmill. It "slips" a bit and I am so afraid of it messing up my knee or something, I run with great caution on it. I was fine today on it, but I am always more careful on the treadmill than outside.

I wanted to stop at 1.5 miles, but then began to run harder and that desire went away. I felt good having done what I set out to do. It felt good to get in the bathtub and rest afterwards. I love the huge sweat after stopping the exercise! It feels so good!

Not very motivated today, but glad I went ahead with the planned run/walk. Thank You, Lord, for Your help in that. Without You, I don't know what I would get done.

Question: I need some running tights for winter. Where do I buy them? How much do I spend? What kind? Any help out there?

Just got off of the treadmill. I ran a mile and walked a mile all together. I ran some, walked some, ran some........that kind of day today. For some reason, my left hip and thigh were bothering me everytime I ran today. I never hurt when I am running outside, but that old treadmill messes me up. The only reason I didn't run outside today is because I noticed our neighbor's truck was across the street, so I thought he might be in the woods hunting. I never like to be on the road during gun season, so.......I stayed inside.

I feel great even though I have some hip/thigh pain. I love the sweating now! I love the feel of it. I had trouble going a full mile today, though, for some reason. My body felt sluggish and tired even though I have gotten a lot of rest over the past few nights. I haven't run in two days, so maybe that's it.

Mentally, I wasn't up for running today either. I was fighting myself because it was already 4pm and I know how much I need to do to get dinner ready and the house ready for Wade to walk in the door. Then I think about my goals and how Wade loves it that I am getting more fit. So I got dressed. If I can get myself dressed for exercise, I am good to go.

Something else is happening in my mind. As I drive down Kanis, I see these long stretches of road and all I can think is "I want to run this." WHAT IN THE WORLD IS GOING ON HERE?! WHO AM I?!?

I don't think Wade will ever let me run on Kanis where we are. It is probably too dangerous. He won't let me bike by myself out here. He sure won't let me run. Maybe I can get Luke to run with me sometime.

So glad I ran. So glad I am sweating. It all feels so good! Thank You, Lord, for this feeling. This body. This health.

Didn't exercise today. Not sure why except that I felt a real need to get all of the schooling and mine and Wade's laundry done. The laundry is still not done, but I am working on it. I had thought about going running this afternoon, but need to drive to Vilonia for a family b-day dinner.

It's pretty overcast, have had some rain, but I know I could have gone out. What is wrong with me today?

Today we went to Memphis for Gma's 90th birthday luncheon. I wanted to exercise before we went, so I got up at 6am and ran 1 mile on the treadmill. I didn't enjoy the treadmill today for some reason. I had to walk for the first two minutes because my treadmill is 10 years old and needs to warm up or it "skips" which hurts my knees and could trip me up. Then I ran for a mile and it wasn't hard, but boring. It felt good to do the exercise before leaving town.

The best part of my day was when I first walked in. Two family members (who live out of state) noticed that I had lost weight. When one asked me how much and I said "10" her response was that she would have thought more. She asked what I was doing, how far I was running, etc. Of course, running 2 miles is nothing for an aunt that was there who has run for years! 2 miles is a warm up for her, but that's okay. I am doing it slowly, what I can and I have lost 10 pounds!

And today, people noticed.

I thought it would take much longer for people to notice. It made me smile.

And made me want to run again tonight when I got back home. :)

Oh, and I have been doing my push ups, but I switched from down on my knees to regular push ups. Hope I am getting stronger, but they are very hard!

Great run today! I didn't run yesterday at all, but it didn't seem to have an impact on today's run. I have been reading about running and some books say run every other day as you are training or beginning to run. Would you agree?

I increased my miles today. I ran 2 miles and only had a few walk breaks, one being the big hill (up and down). I decided to run the dirt road today since Kevin graded it. It was really nice to NOT be focused on a certain hill or a certain place where I usually have in my mind that I can't get up the whole thing without stopping. Instead, I ran thinking, "I'll run until I can't run any more." I ran a lot. I was able to run uphill a lot today since most of the way between our house and the big hill is uphill. There are a few places that level out, but mostly uphill. Even when I walked up the big hill, it is so steep that my heart rate was up. Then I ran all the way home and even before I got to our driveway, I knew I could go further (and I wanted to increase to 2 miles today if possible), so I continued on to Tom and Nancy's house, turned around and came back. Even up the last little, slowly sloping hill, I didn't think "I can't make it" but rather was thinking "This is no problem today." :) That makes me sooooo happy! I am loving this!

One of the favorite parts of running for me is when I begin to break out in a sweat. I only sweat after I have stopped running, but when I get back inside the house within 5 minutes, I begin to sweat. It feels like breaking a fever and it feels good to me. I know I am doing a good thing.

I just feel stronger. I am so excited about this journey and that I have run now for a few weeks and still want to. I wanted to yesterday, but we left the house early to go to the dentist, it wasn't a good visit for Grant and I had not slept in 5nights. I was exhausted.

Today I was out of the house early, too, but I decided to run this afternoon. I am not really an early morning runner like a lot of people I read about. I like my coffee and Bible in the morning when my eyes don't want to open. Maybe one day I will transition, but this works for me right now. I usually go run around 10 or 11 in the morning, but today it was 4pm.

Thank You, Lord, for helping me persevere and for giving me an enjoyment in this at this time in my life.

Ran on the treadmill today for some reason. I ran 1.5 miles in 18:36min and burned 215 calories. I usually run at 5mph, but today ran mostly at 5.3 mph and then ran some bursts at 6 mph. It felt great! I went for .75 miles before stopping for a minute to walk, then ran another .5 mile before walking a bit more, then a few bursts at 6. I feel great! I am going to go lay in the bathtub with a book now. That is the reward for my running!

Great to be back on my running feet after 3 days off!

I think I greatly prefer to be outside while running than inside on the treadmill, staring at our dart board. I enjoy listening to the noises of outside rather than my iPod for some reason, too, right now. Running is such concentration for me (and hard work) that I don't want any distractions. Running inside leaves the kids close enough to want to come in and ask me questions or talk. I have had to explain to them that I can't talk while exercising. Now they know it has to be an emergency to come interrupt me.

Tomorrow I am hoping to increase my time. On the blacktop, I want to go one more time around which increase my time and distance. I will probably have to walk some, but that's okay. I am increasing little by little.

I would love to hear how other people started running and gradually increased their time and distance. Endurance.......that's the key. There is a point where I think I can't go any further, where I used to quit and walk, but now I press myself to go a bit further. I tell myself (if I am wearing my iPod) "just to the end of this song" or "just to the top of this hill".......whatever is ahead just out of my reach. I have found that the heavy desire to quit and give up, lessens when I do this (unless I am at the end of the run).

I am writing as if I have readers, but this blog is private for now. I have decided only to make it public if I run for 30 days. I want to make it a habit and not just start something else. There have been so many times I have started something and not finished. I don't want this to be that way.

I found myself reading several people's running blogs today. I have wasted a lot of time today reading them actually. I have housework that needs to be done and instead I have been reading. I can't get enough of it. I can't get enough help and wisdom, encouragement and tips.

I also have been looking for new clothing. I bought something on sale while in Branson last time on a clearance rack that has been great! It's a half-zip, long sleeve pullover that keeps me warm if I run in the early morning or cool days. I did find that I had to wear something under it because I always get hot and have to pull it off and tie it around my waist. I think this winter when it is really cooler, it will be perfect. And I got it 75% off! That's the best part!

Eating is much better today. I really haven't eaten enough and it's about time to go to youth group. I am not hungry today for some reason. I will have some fruit soon and then not sure what I will eat for dinner as we have to eat so early before youth group and youth worship.

Still loving to cook healthy meals. I am going to try a new soup from a friend's blog that has kale, sweet potatoes and lentils in it. I can't wait. Not sure my family will like it, but I am craving it.

After increasing my running last Friday, I haven't run since Saturday! UGH! I hope I can get back into it tomorrow. I don't have a good excuse except that I haven't fallen asleep before 4 or 5am each night since then. I have not felt real well, but not enough to keep me off of the road. Praying tonight I sleep and that I can get up and run in the morning.

My eating has been horrible. I have eaten whatever I wanted from BLTs to chocolate cake and pecan pie with ice cream. Have to get back on track! Food journal, here I come!!!

Also didn't go to WW last night because we were having dinner with Aunt Susan and Uncle Steve at Tom and Nancy's. At least my weight wasn't up too badly today.

My running yesterday took a jump forward. I could run from the bottom of my driveway to the top of the little hill in front of Non's, take a small rest, then run again to the middle of the hill that leads to the shop. Then I would run from the top of that hill coming back to the bottom of my driveway! YEAH ME!!!

Then today I ran from the front porch stairs all the way to Non's (had to go in), up to the middle of the hill toward the shop. Then ran from the shop all the way to the bottom of my driveway without stopping! Another leap! Yeah! I am enjoying it more and more. I feel a drive to get out there now. I don't want to miss. We are cleaning and getting ready to go to Nana's tonight, as well as getting ready for the reception tomorrow, so I didn't think we would get a run in, but I thought of a way. I needed to go to Non's to get my tablecloth, so I ran down there, to the shop and back. Then I got a phone call that Nay needed to know about (she was at Non's helping Leah clean) and so I ran down there to tell her and ran back. Where there is a will there is a way!

**For you long term, long distance runners, I know you want to laugh, but this is a beginning for me and I am excited!**

Thank You, Lord, for a desire to get in shape and for the enjoyment that running is to me right now. May it grow and continue.

I couldn't get my Power 90 to work......well, technically, I couldn't get my remote to move to the sculpting workout. So Rene' and I went outside and walked half of the first round, then ran the last half. Then we ran most of the second half of the trip. So 1.5 miles in all. We then came back in and do the AB workout on the cd. We could get to that. I didn't sweat so much today, but did find myself pushing myself up the hills more. It is much easier to push myself with someone running beside me. Rene' and I run at the same pace, so it helped me. When she was ready to quit on the last hill, I helped her get up it. We both had trouble breathing, feeling like we couldn't get good breaths.

I am starting to like running a little bit. :)

GAINED .2 pounds this week at Weight Watchers. UGH! I don't want another week of gaining!

Yesterday (Monday), Rene' and I did the first day of Power 90. It kicked my butt, but I could do a lot of it. We even went out and walked about half a mile after to just stretch out.

Today we were supposed to do the second day of the Power 90, but one thing after another.........it didn't happen. I really have to do it first thing in the morning or it won't happen. So tomorrow morning, even if she doesn't want to do it, I have to go to my room and do it. And I want to run tomorrow, too.

I ate horribly today out of frustration. UGH! Bad day! Got mad at a couple of people in my life and chose to eat out of frustration. I made a yummy healthy crock pot dinner, but then made the yummiest mashed potatoes (with whipping cream that I needed to use up) and Nay made four loaves of sour dough bread. Then she made her chocolate recipe that fell through a couple of nights ago. It was so great with ice cream that we stole from Tom and Nancy's house. What is that called? Chocolate............Cobbler! There's the word I was looking for!

I can't believe how much I miss running when I go one day without it. I really am enjoying the feeling that running gives me even if I don't love running itself. Does that make sense? I find myself even reading running blogs. What is happening to me?!

I also am more and more intrigued with a healthier diet and recipes. I am looking up vegan blogs, too. Not sure where it will lead, but I am loving the veggies and not enjoying meat so much. In the meal I made tonight, I cut me half a chicken breast, but didn't eat it all. I would rather have the veggies alone. Weird for me.........and because I have expressed this lack of desire in meat for the past 6 months, Wade thinks I am weird. He laughs at it! :) The hunter is afraid his wife is going to go vegan or vegetarian. What would be so bad about that? I think he would support me, just give me a hard time.

This journey of looking for better health is enjoyable to say the least.

Jogging.........Learning to Run

Today I have been trying to jog/run for about 10 days now consistently. I have tried several times before, but this is the first time I have done it almost everyday and want to keep up with it. Each day I find myself DESIRING to get my exercise gear on and step outside. I know that once I step outside, I will be fine. My desire and "get up and go" will do just that........get up and go.

When I first started, I decided to stay on black top because our road is so bad from all of the rain we have had over the spring, summer and fall. There are very deep ruts in the road and I don't want to sprain an ankle.

So I started out walking down my driveway, running down the small slope before getting to the small hill that crests right before the Arnold's. I didn't run up anything at first. Slowly, I began to try running until I couldn't run anymore, then walk for a few minutes to catch my breath, then run again. When I started running up the hills (small slopes), I would count my steps to get me further along......1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 1, 2, 3,..........For some reason, it helped me. I didn't make it far the first few tries, but today I could see progress. Well, bigger progress.

I have seen progress over the past week. I could run a little bit further and for a little longer on the flat spaces. One day, I even ran further up the small slopes. That really encouraged me.

Today I was able to run from my driveway, all the way up the hill to the split in the pavement in front of the Arnolds. That was a first! I was so excited! I think I could have gone further, but Rene' was with me and had stopped to walk. And I was so excited that I made it all the way up the small hill, I had to stop and tell Nay that that was a first for me!

So Rene' and I (after eating very badly for 2 days) went out today to walk/run. We walked the first time around at a fast pace, probably 4 mph, swinging our arms, etc. Then the second time around we began to run some. She said that I didn't need to wait on her and so when I ran, she ran with me. She was awesome! What took me 10 days to do, she did today with me. She only fell behind me twice. The second time around we ran down the hills, on the flat surfaces and a little bit uphill. The third time around, we ran most of the way. I was so excited! It was the best I have done yet! It DOES help to have a partner! I wish she lived closer, but we are going to do it this week. We have to.

On Thursday of this past week, I noticed that I was fine breathing while running, but once I stopped to walk, it was hard for me to breath. I was panting hard. That frustrated me. Not sure if that is normal or not, but I am doing a bit of research online. I have several running friends, but I have not told anyone yet that I am running. I have a history of being a good starter, but not a good finisher, so I don't want to say anything. I just want to prove that I can do it. I also don't sweat until I come inside and sit down. Weird.

I will tell you this, this is the first time in a long time that I feel horrible when I don't get out there and run. I want to. I desire it. I really long to get out there. There is something about it. I can't say that I enjoy it, but yet I don't ever want to give it up. Doesn't make sense, I know, but I am glad for the desire.

I have had no pain at all. I am running slowly and carefully, but I don't want to ruin it early on. I want to learn to run better, faster, longer. I know it will be slow for me, but I pray it is something I stick with.

I do believe that running has helped me lose 9.6 pounds in the past 3 weeks. Even when I would not track all of my points, I could still lose when I was running. I also feel so wonderful AFTER I run. There was one day I wanted to run twice in that one day. Again, weird. I am not a person who has ever enjoyed running. What is happening to me?!

I don't know, but I like it.

Okay, this running is really a great thing. I did not want to exercise yesterday, but the weather was beautiful, so when we were done with school at 1pm, I got dressed out in my work out clothes. I headed outside with Lydia and Grant to run/walk while they rode bikes. It was the best thing I did all day long. I didn't eat well yesterday, but today was down a pound and I think it is because running really works! It is a great exercise and it doesn't take me long. I can't go far! I walked/jogged 1.5 miles yesterday and it took me 20 minutes. That is not a fast pace, but I don't care. I am jogging further and longer. I am able to jog more uphill than all downhill. I do see improvements.

I got my Power 90 in the mail last night. I am going to look over it today and set my plan for starting it. Today I will just run/walk again, but will have to do it on the treadmill because it is raining yet again. I tend to run faster and harder outside, but that's okay. I'll have to push myself. Especially since I am very hungry and not eating well today! :)

Whoo-hoo!!!! Lost 4.8 pounds at WW last night over two weeks. That puts my total at -9.6! I will take it. I ran/walked 1.5 miles yesterday in 20:30 min and felt great! I have been able to wear the cords (Saturday night) that I haven't worn since my England trip in April 07! I am soooo excited about wearing different clothes. I can't wait for my Power 90 to come in!

Discipline is affecting other areas of my life as well. School is going well. Cleaning my face each night. It just runs over into others areas of my life and that is good.

Lord, thank You for helping me. May I keep things balanced and yet continue to seek Your help in being disciplined in my life. Thank You.

Yesterday (Sunday) I wore a skirt that I haven't worn in 2 years. I was excited! Summer said, "You look good" but she knows I am trying. I am waiting to see how long it takes for others to notice I am losing. I have always heard that it takes about 3 months. I have been on for about a month now.

I hope to get my Power 90 this week. Until then I will continue running/walking. I am enjoying it.

Tonight is weigh in at WW. On my scale today, it shows me down, but I am weighing first thing in the morning, with little clothes on. I also think my scales are about 3 pounds different from theirs, but I think my scales are heavier which is nice. We will see.

I have a temptation right before WW today. I am going to Starbucks with one of my girls and I need to NOT drink anything at all. Praying I can do that.

I have given up choir for some personal reasons. It gives us Sunday nights here together and that has been good. I am cooking more and enjoying being with my family. I just need to be less concerned about what others think of me and think only of what God knows about me already. I want my heart to be fully HIS, engaged in HIS will for my life.

Well, I am good into my journey of getting healthy. The first week in Weight Watchers, I lost 4.8 pounds!!!! I was soooo excited! The next weekend Mom and Dad went with us to Branson and I didn't eat so well, but we walked a lot. When I got back, I didn't go to WW that Monday night, but my scale showed that I had lost a pound! I have exercised everyday this week and I am even running more on the treadmill.

I have a busy day today, so I got up had my time with the Lord and then went outside to run/walk because the kids were sleeping in the game room. It was cold, but felt good. I went 1.2 miles in 19 minutes. It was harder because of the hills, but I find that I run faster outside than on the treadmill.

I wore two pairs of jeans this week that I have not been able to get into for 2 years! That is the most exciting part! I will have almost a new wardrobe when I lose this excess weight. I will also like to go shopping, I think. :)

I can't tell you how much better I feel each day. I have more energy. I am sleeping wonderfully even when off of the Zyrtec. My endurance is increasing and my taste for good food is getting better. I am experimenting with good recipes, healthy recipes. We are going to reshape this family little by little. I just pray that I can learn to grocery shop and buy things that are not the "norm" for us. Grant needs to eat better. He had 8 cavities Thursday at the dentist! 8!!!!! Things have got to change and now is the time.

Wade and Luke started the P90X program. I was a bit skittish of that one, so I got the Power90. It has not come in yet. I hope to get it next week sometime. I am looking forward to building my strength and muscles as I lose weight.

Praying also that I can keep a balance with all of this. Losing weight can be addictive.

I am going to meet Mom at Weight Watchers tonight at 5:45pm. One more time. It's terrible, but because I have failed so much, I don't feel very optimistic. Sure would like to complete it to the end this time, even if I have setbacks on the way. I will be spending money so it really matters. Mondays are great and terrible weigh in days. It will help me NOT cheat on the weekends like I usually do. : )